Social networks, build or break relationship?

Talked to a friend few days back. While talking to her, I began to think that social networking is breaking rather than bridging the relationship. Well, as we can see, people nowadays are more glued to their social networks. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, blog and many more. Yes, social networks bring people together in many ways. But, I am seeing quite frankly that the break down of relationships on social networks start with first building a relationship then later after a relationship is built, people can do things intentionally or unintentionally to break down relationships. Hmm, may be because we had set in our mind that those social networks are just a wall. A wall where you can write anything you feel, anything you think, and if anyone else doesn't believe in what you do, they can remove you from their friends list. I have seen many persons go through this situation.

Some people use social networking to help vent their frustrations with life, with friends, with anything. So do I. But, we forget that the public could see what we have wrote on our wall. Sometimes, it hurts many hearts. Sometimes, it gave false sense of what's going on. It's happened to me last week. I tweet something and someone had false sense on me. I can tweet back and marah-marah, I also can post a status on Facebook and she also deserve a post in my blog, but I don't. I want text her personally tapi takut makin keruh. So, I just let her be in her own world.

"Well, I could be angry but you're not worth a fight. I've count to ten and I'm feeling alright. And besides, I'm moving on." Senyum. 

Oh, and yeah. This WhatsApp last seen thiggy. My Goodness. This functionality is really such a 'mood killer'. You can know if people ignore you and not reading your messages. Many relationships have ended because of it.

Note to self-- do not over-share.

This one fine day. In this week. I sat. And think back. Why this stoopid me shared every.single.thing.with.the.world? Why do I let myself publicize my activities. Cries. If any of you see me sharing any unreasonable things, bite my leg. Please.

Between dreams and reality

I just came back from a conference in Boston, Massachusetts, USA. InshaAllah, I'll write about it later in next post. But, I didn't just bring back a lot of small pieces paper (read: receipts), I also bring back many things in my head. Many things to think about. Many things to consider before I make a decision.

Between dreams and reality.

Between ambitions and responsibility.

Can't they match to each other?

And I wonder, what is Allah trying to show me...

Tango.

I'm now, ready to tango!

Eid Mubarak

As cliche as everyone does, raya post!

Even though we have moved into the last week of Syawal. Who cares. Lol.

Up and down the country, people are still holding Hari Raya feasts and open houses and this will continue right to the last day of Syawal. So, I think it is not too late for me to wish all my Muslim friends,

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

Happy Eid Mubarak.

And I'd like to ask forgiveness, for all my wrongdoings

in and out, up to toe.

May Allah accept our good deeds, our worship over Ramadan

and bless us to make it to the next one.

Every year, praise to God, I get to celebrate it with my family. Even though I'm miles away from Malaysia. The members may not always be the same each year, sometimes fewer, sometimes more with the new addition to the family, but we'll celebrate nonetheless. Alhamdulillah, praise to God, we had full house for this year! Everyone's back and we get the chance to celebrate it with the whole family!

This year, my parents and I decided to go for turquoise for the first day of raya. However, pity Mak, her baju raya couldn't be ready on time. Even I'm back to Japan, the baju still not done yet. Pffffttt. Screwed you, Mak Cik Tailor! I have this kind of allergies with people who give you promises,

"Boleh kak, boleh. InshaAllah boleh siap ni sebelum raya."

And at the same time,

"Saya buat ketupat jugak kak. Tak nak tempah ke?"

But, it's end up....

Baju tak siap and ketupat sampai petang dah basi. Sheeessshh!

Now tell me, how can Melayu be respected? We've forgive you but, will never tempah anything from you next time.. 

Jin toncet. Dah salin baju but still want to be in the picture.

Baby, it's Ramadan....

"So how's your day?"

"I hate my Sensei. He once said it is OK for me to write my paper in English but earlier today he said....."

"Baby, it's Ramadan. You know right..?"

"............"

Ramadanへようこそ！

Ramadan is set to kick off tomorrow with the first fasting day.

This is challenging with the rising temperatures, hot summer and dry day.

Particularly for the Muslims in the northern hemisphere where the days will be soooo long.

In UK, if I'm not mistaken, fasting could be as long as 19 hours!

My God!

This is look so impossible! 

However, look at them.

They are so eagerly await this month of blessings and excitedly welcoming Ramadan. Thanks God for this amazing creatures that You give me. I am blessed that I am surrounded with the people who always kept me on the right track, bringing me closer to Allah and inspire me to be a better person.

Alhamdulillah, I just feel so lucky to have crossed path with them.

Speaking of friends, my mom always tell me, choose your friend wisely.

But I would think no. I shouldn't be too choosy and be friend with all, making as many friends as I can. But, now I get it.

I have a lot of friends, but as I grow up I realise that the friends who remind me about life priorities, the ones who I can spill my heart and soul to, I can count with probably one hand. 

And this also reflect me back of what kind of friend that I am.

I always take for granted these people. People who always listen and genuinely interested in the good and bad of me, who willing to share the pieces of my life. Sometimes, I am too busy doing grown up stuff, until i forget to put other things on pause mode and focus on our friendship. 

Sorry.

So, hopefully this Ramadan could bring me a great opportunity to become a better version of me.

Long distance relationship with Mr. Doctor

People ask me, how do we survive in the long distance relationship?
What's the secret to making a LDR work. And I will go like,
Err.. Ermm.. Umm.. Hmmm...
I don't know lah wey!
I don't think I'm an expert, nor do I think I'm perfect in any relationship.
 But, we have past half decade been together and 5 years in this long distance relationship.

Thousands miles away from each other. Can only meet once a year, during hari raya.

I myself can say it is not easy and it needs a lot of effort.
No, I didn't said that I'm proud with it, with how long we have been together even though we are far apart.
I.AM.SO.FREAKING.SCARED. And still.
There's no crystal ball that can predict how long a relationship will last.
I don't know what will happen tomorrow. Because everything is in Allah's hand.
And I believes that the long wait, the hopes and dreams, even your doas in every solat:
if she/he's not your jodoh planned by Him, she/he's still not.
But I'm still hoping that Syamim is the right one for me.

The distance is nothing, it is the first step that is difficult. I cried like an idiot, the day Syamim fly to Bandung. In the class you know. The body was in the class but
the mind and soul gone elsewhere.
I easily get emotional in few weeks after he leaved. People asking me about Syamim, seeing couple having dinner together, phone stay put without any ring.. 
It does tears me down. Wailed, helplessly.

We do text, Skype and talk on the phone daily but there's time when I went

"Hello baby!!"

And he went

"Tak boleh cakap sorry sorry." 

Woi, aku call jauh kot! Pffttttt

Booooooo doctors!

But, all in all, he tried to do the best for me. He gave all his hours when he had the chance.
Even we are far apart, we still do things together. Watching movies together. Having our meals together. Do homework together. Go for shopping together. And even sometime, we sleep together! Haha. One day if I have a chance to met the Skype inventor and any other applications that we used to keep in touch, I will shake their hands and say thank you. They are really save my life. Muahaha.

Here are some bullet points to really put in your back pocket. And I hammered this into my head too. Don't be jealous, trust each other and keep the faith. It's not only one to carry on a relationship, it takes two to tango. So, do give and take and most important is everything happen or tak puas hati, better said and expressed, rather than kept and suppressed. Discuss. Heart to heart. InshaAllah, it would get your relationship better.

Syamim keep reminding me that distance won't keep us far. How busy we are, how limited time we have to talk to each other. Yeah, he keep saying this because he is such a busy bee. When I am free, he is busy. When he free, I am busy. It's always like that. But it's always him who always missing in action. Class during the day and on call at the night. Following with another classes on the tomorrow morning. Who said dating to a doctor is easy?? I always pray to Allah, for grant me bundles of patience.

 From now on, this is what i will have to go through:

all the

baby-I-have-to-work

or

kejap-I-have-patients

or

kita-skype-later-tonight

Pfffffffffftttttttttt

Our movie date.

Candle light dinner on his birthday.

We have gone this far and it's already late to turn back. All I hope, we'd grow old together. It happens in the movies and I hope we will also see a happy ending. Ameen..